‘Tis the season to be jolly fa-la-la blah blah blah. I would ordinarily love this time of year. Nah, not really. Retail and commercialism has ruined the magic of the Christmas season. Instead of being a season of goodwill and cheer, it has turned into give-me-more and be totally nasty. Boy, did I swallow grumpy pills today. Guess it is because of the general nastiness being spread around.
Julie at From Inmates To Playdates has posts that she terms Letters To Crazy People. They are hilarious and entertaining. I am snatching her idea little bit, by posting my own letter to the Christmas shopper. Feel free to chime in at the comment section. And I suggest not drinking while reading, I don’t want to be responsible if you spit a drink all over your monitor/laptop.
Dear Crazy Christmas Shoppers(Or why do you have to be so mean)
Dear Crazy Christmas Shopper,
I am writing this letter on behalf of all the stressed-out retail workers who are working this holiday season. In order to understand why you are being so nasty, I have a few questions for you. Really, I’d like some honest answers so that I know how to make your life easier, and sacrifice my sanity at the same time.
First off, why do you have to be so mean? Seriously, do you really think that you are the only person in this world that has shopping to do? And are you that self-centered that you think that you and your needs are the only ones that matter? As someone who genuinely wants to help you, it is soul-crushing to know that you think I am not good enough to be treated with a little common sense. Or courtesy.
Along the same line as being treated with courtesy, is it that much trouble to have some patience? Of course I want to help you find the perfect gift, but is it really necessary to stand there and tap your foot while I am on the phone? I promise, I will get to you as soon as I can, just hang in there. And in case you haven’t noticed, I keep an eye on who was at the counter first, and will help everyone in turn. Again, other customers have needs too, and we are knocking ourselves out to serve everyone as soon as possible. And why oh why do you yell at me because the book or item you want is out of stock? I can only do so much with what I am given with. Perhaps you should think about starting you shopping earlier? Don’t take it out on me because you waited till the last-minute.
Did you know that walking through a store while texting can really hurt someone? I have seen many elderly people get run over by people who are walking and texting. Guess what? Most of them are not teenagers, but adults that should know better than that. I love having to apologize to Grandma because of your ignorance. If you need to take a call or send a text, please step to the side out-of-the-way. It is simple. Along the same line, when you are checking out, please put your &#!& phone down for a second. I am devoting my attention to you…is it too much for me to get the same courtesy?
Speaking of things you should never do: drive like an idiot. Why does the Christmas holiday bring out “aggressive driver mode” in normal human beings? Driving up my ass is not going to get you there any faster. Here is a novel concept, instead of driving fast, try leaving earlier. Try it sometime, it actually works. And stalking me for my parking spot? That is a no-no too. We are all in a hurry, but I am sick and tired of almost being run down by an aggressive driver. I just put in a full day, and I am usually tired. I want to get home to my family, and I’d rather not do that by way of an ambulance. It takes too much paperwork, and wastes the security guard’s time as well.
Despite all the things that irk the beejesus out of me, I want you to know a few things. I am truly sorry for the retail workers that are not professional to you. That is not right either. I guess that is why some shoppers are so mean, because there are some out there that are just plain dumb and nasty and unprofessional. But know this, I like helping you. I love finding books for you. It makes me smile to have a customer excited because I helped them find a new author. And when your kid smiles and says thank you? It’s a jackpot! Seeing an adult smile at you and be polite? Priceless. That is what makes the retail season so enjoyable, despite the crazy Christmas shoppers out there. Because we know it isn’t everyone, but those few little gems wreck everything for everybody else. Try not to do it anymore, okay?
The Overworked Retail Worker that really wants to do everything for you.
So share with me the things that make the holiday season not-so-nice for you. I feel better that I got things out there, so why don’t you? Leave a comment and tell me why!
More Christmas ideas
I’ve joined forces with some other wonderful bloggers to bring you more great Christmas ideas:
- What is Advent and 10 Ways to Celebrate – If your kids think Advent is just about chocolates and calendars hop on over to Shari Lynne’s post and they can learn all about what Advent really means.
- Countdown to Christmas: Santa Beard Printable – This has to be the most adorable advent calendar ever. As the days go by your little one gets to add to Santa’s beard until it’s all white and fluffy in time for him to deliver those presents. Stephanie has even included a free printable so you just have to print it out and stick it on the wall.
- ABC Family Movies – Don’t miss any of your favourite Christmas movies this year – Megan has all the times and dates for ABC Family’s 25 Days of Christmas.
- DIY Christmas Decorations with Apples – If you like to make your own Christmas decorations check out these great ideas from Heather for decorating with apples.
- 4 Best Holiday Cookies Recipes for Christmas – Christmas wouldn’t be Christmas without some delicious cookies to share with family and friends. Clare has rounded up 14 amazing recipes that you can give as gifts or eat all by yourself!
- Gifting on a Beggar’s Budget – If you’re on a tight budget this year don’t miss Heather’s fantastic ideas for giving great gifts without spending a lot of money.
- 65 Stocking Stuffers for a Teen Guy – Do you have a teen guy on your list and you just can’t think what to buy for him this year? Well Mitzi comes to your rescue with no less than 65 stocking stuffer ideas!
- Swedish Braid – If you’d like to start a new tradition this year, how about baking a Swedish Braid for Christmas breakfast, Barbara shares some tips in this post.
- How to Prepare for Christmas Dinner – If you’re hosting Christmas Dinner this year you will not want to miss Candi’s schedule for making sure everything runs smoothly.